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Saturday 30 May 2015

Perceived Mistresses and Married men



I guess I needed some serious shaking up when I just analyzed and found out majority of my friends are all much older to me. Lately the people I've been casually chatting with are all men much above my age but me being frivoulous or foolish free-spirit ( call it what you may ) I don't think of consequences, unless I foresee it to happen rather too soon.

Don't get me wrong, I'm not one to roll my eyes (LIES!)  at the 'marriage talk'. Considering now that I am approaching a certain age, the gossip spreads like wildfire more among relations than anywhere else. My problem here is of a different kind. Ignorance is bliss as they say and at times we never think such-and-such thing could ever happen to us. Until it does. 

Two words. Married. Men.

Before you jump to conclusions, let me clarify I am NOT talking about affairs. But hey, interest taken can be misinterpreted in several ways. Easy to slander regardless. 

There are two sides to this, like every story. There are friends you have know since the being of time who get hitched and then there are those who become friends while they are sailing in the ' I'm married ' vessel. The former = no troubles. The latter however, cause of all troubles.

One of my closest girlfriends is getting married in under a month and I'm the one losing my sh*t. ( No, I don't have diarrhea, thankyouverymuch )  It's because I feel like I'm about to lose something. Relationships equations change, priorities change and I'm praying desperately she doesn't become one of those people who starts suggesting marriage to anyone one of us with zero prospects. ( JK Bluwis ).

Naturally, the people surrounding my work area are mostly men. Married men, to be precise. A casual cup of tea and a catch up seems harmless to us, but not to the world around us. If my momma was to find out, I'd be slapped right in the face. Because good women don't befriend married men.

It doesn't always strike me that the mere exchange of words in the same room can be misled to believe that something is on -going. Believe me when I say, I'm just a friend. Till that side of their life is well concealed, I don't tend to pay much attention to it. At times, when I do learn the fact that they are married, I gradually pull away. By then it dawns on me that what I've done was probably not  wrong but not right either. Lets just say it wasn't appropriate. Part of me says why not? You were just friends. Can't married people have single female friends?

Can they really have single female friends? Newly made friends I mean.

While researching on the topic, I read words of caution from women AND MEN saying that if your hubby is spending time or talking a lot about a new friend of the opposite sex, you've got to be careful. When I read it that way it does make it sound like something's up. Although from the other side, the woman might have been a genuine friend and nothing more.

My conscious only starts to tug on me when I'm introduced to the wife herself. I begin to think, what would I do if I were her? How would I feel if my husband went on and on about a woman, a young one that too. Hurtful, isn't it? Even when you've managed to spending so many trusting years and do not want to begin being the nosy, nagging wife, still the mind can't stop racing. A mountain is made of a mole hill. Or may be the root cause was me from the very beginning.

'But we were just friends!'  The opposing side of me says. A mistress is well hidden, but not a friend.
It could be highly possible that doubt might also make it impossible to give friendship a fair shot among the two women.

It's amazing to see how fragile relationships are and  to nurture them, we treat them with utmost tenderness. We try our best not to falter. Sometimes it just happens.

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Wednesday 6 May 2015

Book Review: The Final Empire ( Mistborn Book 1 ) by Brandon Sanderson




Pages :  541

Read on : Kindle

Review:  It's very rare that a fantasy novel impresses me so much. The Final Empire is filled with genuine-ness. Don't get me wrong, I love reading fantasy but there's always that inevitable whiny lead character that puts a damper on the whole story. This is different. One of those rare gems where each and every character is so beautiful and amazing at the same time that when I imagine them, it's easier for me to see them as individuals with their own variant personality

My favorite characters were Vin and Sazed, well, for obvious reasons. Vin was probably one of the best female characters I have come across. She's clueless but isn't dumb. At the same time doesn't try to be over-smart  As dormant as she is you can see her as observant and strong with her instincts which mostly do turn out right.

She isn't one of those characters who is seen as meek and timid throughout with a sudden surge of power. You can see as she's been part of a thieving group, she stays in the shadows and her potential is well realized in the book. Same goes for Sazed. Even though he is there to wait on her, his intelligence and wit will not diminish his value. He's smart, loyal, well-opinionated and most strikingly, a eunuch. I was floored. I have never read a book ever featuring a eunuch and Brandon Sanderson should be applauded for this absolutely stunning character. He gives them power; equal to the other sexes instead  patronizing them.

Getting down to the plot. The concept is based on the usage of metals. Allomancy and Feruchemy are how the characters get power. They swallow metals which in-turn generates a certain strength. Similarly, combination of metals are used to release special powers too. The author has researched well into the subject and has produced such convincing elements that I almost believed them to be real. Kelsier, his army along with Vin and Sazed are using this power to overthrow the Lord Ruler who is keeping the ordinary people of the Final Kingdom deprived and suppressed. The world no longer lush and vibrant like it used to be, ash falls from the sky, basically a dark fantasy world. There are some points in the book that were more conversation/brain-storming based that felt like a drag on. Other than that, each and every character is firm in persona and engaging.

Lengthy but definitely a must-read by all fantasy lovers.


Final Rating : 4/5

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Saturday 2 May 2015

Book Review: Death of A Salesman by Arthur Miller


Pages :  117

Read on : Kindle

Review:  This is my first time reading a play other than the ones we read in school. For the longest time I had Arthur Miller in my kindle yet never got to it.
I knew 'Death of A Salesman' was a short story about a man who's life revolves around the notion of his 'success' or what he could do once he would get that success. Willy Loman, delusional, kept chasing that dream of making it big someday despite that fact that he was already well into his 60s.  He lives in his created bubble world where he feels everything is going well and that there is still time to achieve that greatness that he dreams of ever so often. Even though in reality, it's quite the opposite. 

I wouldn't call it a split personality disorder, but more a psychological issue that has gotten to him so much that he doesn't realize what is happening around him. Excepting the truth is not something that has happened till late in his home. His wife, Linda, and sons, Biff and Happy play along to his 'perfect salesman' alter ego until one day everything comes crashing down. Willy has lived his life solely for his career, a career that didn't give him anything but travesty. His family, pretends to be happy and jovial around him. Except his son Biff, who years ago found a secret about his father who he idolized, causing him to despise the man.

Due to the obsession of living the ' American ' dream of success, Happy and Biff feel pressurized leading them to alter facts about their lives too, so that their father doesn't see them as a let down.

I loved it all. It's the perfect tale that will make you think, that even in this day and age what happens when you let work or the idea of achieving monetary success will rob of you of everything good around you. On several occasions in the book, you will notice the boys mentioning how they want to simply enjoy the day, the natural beauty around them without really being worried about money or a 9 to 5 desk job. After all of Willy's big ideas and woven dreams, nothing is left behind. 

Since this is a play, getting to know who the characters are, the flashback scenes and timeline was confusing to me. I got the idea of the story, what it was trying to convey and everything else. Just not the best in terms of placement. May be because it's my first time reading a play.

The great thing about reading a short story/play is that the focus is more on the plot and emotions than the descriptive language, which you know I love. For me this was a much needed change to get more variety in my reading. The language is typical American classic, I could imagine the vintage cars, Linda's dress, Willy's suit, hat and briefcase, the boys' side slicked and lightly coifed hairdo. It definitely was something different for me compared to what I usually read. I would recommend this to readers of all age groups. 

Final Rating : 4/5

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